A series of wind-blown snowdrifts greeted me at the door Wednesday morning:
I present to you excerpts recovered from the journal of my expedition to fetch this morning's newspaper:
DAY 1: We set out with a snow shovel and a steely-eyed determination to read today's Oakland Press....
DAY 43: Frostbite claimed Hastings last night.
DAY 44: We ate Hastings.
DAY 45: Expedition chef made a rather festive pudding out of the remnants of Hastings. Morale raised all around.
DAY 49: We ate the chef.
DAY 52: We ate the snow shovel.
DAY 56: We ate the photo of Mrs. Hastings....