In which our intrepid Indianapolis Colts haiku correspondent shows that she still had plenty more ways to describe the awfulness of this season, despite the fact that the Colts have (mercifully) run out of games:
Et tu, Irsay?
Oh, boo hoo! Last one
Not wearing a bloody to-
ga's a
rotten egg!
--Mary Campbell-Droze
Mary has also taken the opportunity to address the future of the Colts, now that they have secured the #1 draft pick with their successful "Suck for Luck" campaign. This time she needed considerably more than 17 syllables, plus the assistance of one of the Patio Boat's other favorite poets:
The Emperor of Passing Offense
(With Apologies to Wallace Stevens)
Call the holder of big huge
stats,
The messed-up-neck one, and bid him tip
His hat and bow with prized
but humble words.
Let the benches offer up the best
As they have used to
bear, and let new Luck
Send footballs past next season's tacklers.
Let
this be finale supreme.
The only emperor is the emperor named
Manning.
Take from the Petroleum Palace
Lacking a 5th MVP, that
QB
On which we'd pinned two Super Bowls once
And dread that we'd no more
save face.
If his honored feats conclude, Canton
Will show how many games
he won.
Let new Luck address the dream.
The only emperor is the emperor
named Manning.
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